the foodstamp fights

the war began at home
like the way it always does
the wounds get more salt
when it’s done by those you love
counting the sorrows
like food stamps
one, two, three
blows to the head
one more booklet
and for sure
I’d have been dead
Momma used to get drunk
And send me to the store
Told me to make change
From the food stamps
And it was a sweet exchange
I with the sweet tooth
Their livers rotted
In the sour booze
I aged this way
Like stale beer
Every memory
Burned by the cigarette
Ashes, ashes
All the drunks
Fall down

But the children
Rise like a new battalion
And the food stamp fights
Carry on
Every month
Every year
Selling it all for beer
Going hungry
For mommy and daddy
And when our number is up
Everyone will see
We are expendable
Just another casualty of war
On the E.B.T.

spirits underneath an artificial blue sky

the boards in the house are loose
some are rotting away
others have been peeled back
the black mold
has filled their chests
there is no breathing room
but we still live here

the walls have been
cracked like smiles
by angry fists and clumsy
kid hands
i have written on these walls
an unfinished epitaph

stains mark the walls
like liver spots
some are chipped and showing
the true color underneath
i hate the color
it is too blue
as we sleep underneath
our artificial sky

no one cleans anymore
the holes have taken over
so often we disappear
no obligations
we cover them with rugs
and hideous couches
forgetting the spirits underneath

we still hold this house together
we manage to keep the doors locked
and use the antique dresser
with only so many handles
to hold onto
these wounds we ignore
plug up with tissue
hide it behind posters
and we are okay
as long as the white world
does not peek in
because we have been naked
in our savagery
for far too long

it would be better
if we still lived in teepees
there are only two holes
one on the top
in which we can escape
into the stars like smoke
instead of falling
through the ones
that are all around our souls
making us condemned
unfit to live in

Some of the things that influence me in a big way is what I am listening to
at the time that I write. Music can somehow manage to set the mood to a particular mindframe of thinking.
If i want to write something dealing with emotion, for instance--I really dive into music like Nina Simone or something like This Mortal Coil or Sarah Mclachlan.
Other times if I want my poems to have a certain kind of playfulness to them I put on a little Ani Difranco or Tori Amos. Music has always been important to my life ever since I started listening to it at the age of 13. I started off writing lyrical poems that were in the spirit of the things Billy Corgan wrote of the Smashing Pumpkins. That man is a great lyricist when he has the right influences. I hope to someday be as good with my poems. I am working on my manuscript of poetry and plan to have it finished by the new year. I have two particular places I am going to send them to, one of which I have met the person who does promotion work for a certain book press based in the midwest. I had the chance of meeting her at the Festival of Books held last month in DeadWood, SD. I tell you you never know who you're going to meet as long as you take that chance to dive into things. Below are some links to the artists who influence me. The rest you can find on my links to the side.


Nina Simone
PJ Harvey
Rachael Yamagata
This Mortal Coil
Sarah McLachlan
Ani Difranco

I have decided to update some links. Some people already know who they are. I just wanted to post them so anyone who wants to know will know what I like to read and what's been influencing me lately. Also I'd like to put here what i've been watching and I recommend these movies to all.

The Hours
Sylvia
Girl, Interrupted
Monster
Boys Don't Cry
Foxfire

These are just some of the movies I own and as you can see I have a thing for
*Based on a True Story* themes